All-Time Top 10 Christmas Movies

10. Babes in Toyland (1934)

Known to some as March of the Wooden Soldiers due to it being reissued in color in 1954, it stars legendary comedy team Laurel and Hardy as bumbling toymakers in a land that is home to the characters from nursery rhymes.

This film, although very antiquated, still maintains that essence of childhood magic where anything is possible and my have been the inspiration for modern day tales about toys coming to life.



9. Elf (2003)

The freshest film of this top ten has been accumulating “classic” points in gobs over the past few years. Each passing Christmas, cable networks are allocating more and more airtime to Will Ferrell’s surreal portrayal of “Buddy,” the adopted human elf.

Ferrell sets his silly meter to maximum in this film, which is only balanced out by the reactions of timeless tough guy, James Caan. Elf is not only hysterical to kids and adults for different reasons, but it’s also able to maintain an original story. Not an easy feat in this genre.

8. Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer (1964) - Stop-Motion

This one’s more for the kids, but if you did see it as a child then it’s forever part of your holiday spirit. The 1964 stop-motion version of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is not only a work of art but it really did bring the classic Christmas song to life. Knowing what goes into stop-motion animation, this film is even more impressive through mature eyes than that of a child, but on a story level, younger viewers will find the characters mesmerizing and unforgettable.




7. Santa Claus: The Movie (1985)


Dudley Moore, John Lithgow, and Burgess Meredith, what else can you really ask for? This 1985 telling of Santa Claus’ origin is perhaps the most beloved of them all. Uniquely, this “Santa” movie does not have to rely on the strength of its main character. Instead it’s Dudley Moore’s “Patch” and John Lithgow’s “B.Z.,” that really solidify this film in the top ten.

This is one of the first films to delve into the specifics of just how Santa’s magic actually works and how he is able to visit every house around the world in just one night. It was a refreshing take on the character, as children of that era demanded more of an explanation than “he just can.” The time frame is also vehemently stamped into the film, as the “Wall Street” big business greed of the 80’s is the unmistakable villain, personified by top-notch expert antagonist John Lithgow.

Santa Claus: The Movie was a perfect title for this film because even today it remains “the” Santa Claus movie by which all others are compared.




6. Scrooged (1998)

There have been many twists and modern-day takes on the Charles Dickens classic, “A Christmas Carol,” but only one stands alone. Scrooged, starring Bill Murray, follows the story of anti-protagonist Frank Cross, a television network executive that has let success in his job overtake and all but eliminate the caring person he once was. A fantastic supporting cast helps Murray’s character realize what’s really important in life by showing him past, present and future events.

Scrooged has not only dug out a place on cable TV’s holiday programming loop, but to a younger generation it is the quintessential version of “A Christmas Carol” in their minds.




5. The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)

One of Tim Burton’s most revered works, this stop-motion masterpiece is a must see for any fan of superb animation. Add in Burton’s twisted yet heart filled storytelling of an anti-Grinch trying to bring Christmas to his Halloween dominated world, and you have one of the greatest animated works ever produced. Jack “The Pumpkin King,” has become one of the top recognized animated characters as this once holiday cult-classic is now simply, a classic.



4. Home Alone (1990)


A year after Christmas Vacation, director John Hughes gave holiday audiences another big-box present. The family film that turned Mucely Culkin into a household name was also the first to ever crack the half-billion dollar mark in box office gross. Joe Peci showed he can be entertaining without colorful language and that Catherine O’Hara had life after Beetlejuice.

The signature slapstick gags in the film may have lost their once laugh-out-loud status, but Home Alone will remain a holiday tradition for parents to share with their children for many years to come.



3. It's a Wonderful Life (1946)

Black and white, singing and dancing, angels, a lesson learned, and Jimmy Stewart. It’s the Hallmark for the American Christmas film. The tone and feel of the film may be dated, but its message and Jimmy Stewart’s performance seems only to strengthen year after year. Incredibly, many critics considered this film a failure during its original release. Fortunately, their mistakes did not result in a reality where this film does not exist.



2. A Christmas Story (1983)

“Classic” is not a strong enough word for this film. Iconic, is probably more fitting. The countless amount of quotable lines alone is what gives credence to a 24-hour run loop on Christmas Day every year. Ralphie’s quest to obtain the coveted Red Rider BB Rifle has become a right of passage during the Christmas season. Unbeknownst to most, Peter Billingsly (Ralphie) has had a decent acting career since his apex during childhood, however the world will never be able to forget him as the boy who just might shoot his eye out.




1. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (1989)

If there is not a copy of Christmas Vacation in the house, you might as well just dump the egg nog, unwrap the presents, pull down the lights, and set the tree on fire, because without this film it’s just not Christmas. Besides, you can have a lot more fun by watching all that stuff happen in the film.

It’s very unusual for a movie franchise to hit its high note during the third installment, but that’s exactly what happened for Chevy Chase’s Griswold clan. No film is more quoted during Christmas time, which is why its success was not of the instant brand. Opening at #2 back in December of 1989, Christmas Vacation utilized word-of-mouth praise, which carried the film to the box office top spot in its 3rd week. That snowball effect has also led to the film grossing half of its total theater dollars in VHS and DVD rentals.

Christmas Vacation is the consummate formula for comedy and holiday cheer and is not only a must watch during the month of December, it’s a must own.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1

It’s the beginning of the end for what will likely be herald as the most successful franchise in film history. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1, the 7th film installment of the Harry Potter saga, is suppose to function as a spring board for the most anticipated portion of the protagonist’s story arc. Unfortunately, at the core of this film, loyal fans are only rewarded with even more anticipation.

In part 1 of this 2-part finale, Harry and his inseparable mates Ron and Hermione are on the lamb from Lord Voldemort and his minions. Laterally, the trio is also in a quest to find and destroy the four remaining horcruxes, which encase splinters of the dark lord’s soul. In fact it’s not just Harry who’s being hunted, anyone from non wizard or witch bloodlines is in danger as Voldemort attempts a takeover of the Ministry of Magic. With the “Wizarding World” under his control, Voldemort’s only remaining caveat to his supremacy would be the reminder of his greatest failure . . . Harry Potter himself.

The inherent flaw with Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 is that unlike the rest of the films in the series, this chapter does not hold firm as a stand-alone story. It’s like going to see an Aerosmith concert with Huey Lewis and the News as the opening act. The only problem is that after 2 hours and 20 minutes of Huey Lewis, he leaves the stage and tells the audience that Aerosmith will be out to play in about 8 months. Deathly Hallows Part 1 is the chocolate cookie part of an Oreo that just won’t twist off; it only serves to set up the cream that cannot be accessed and in the end creates more frustration than satisfaction. The film is simply manic, following the core three characters on a roller coaster ride that spins at 55 mph but only inches forward. Too much time is spent trying to strengthen and crystallize the relationship between Harry, Ron and Hermione. Other fan favorites such as Alan Rickman’s Severus Snape or Mathew Lewis’ Neville Longbottom deserved more than just a one-shot cameo, no matter how the source material was constructed.

Perhaps the eminent factor to this film’s square-peg syndrome is the lack of the series’ most colossal staple, the Hogwarts School. Hogwarts, the school where Harry and his peers have been learning magic for the past 6 films, is one of the most important and overlooked characters of the franchise. To see the condition and state of Hogwarts in this film would have been very satisfying even if it were skewed by dark influences. In fact, that revelation would have strengthened the film’s overall and encompassing emotions to a higher degree than characters constantly running through the woods.

What Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 does manage to achieve is the seamless and continuing submersion of darkness where The Half-Blood Prince left off. David Yates is back in the director’s chair for his third Potter film (Order of the Phoenix, 2007, Half-Blood Prince, 2009), which was the appropriate choice as he carries out the facelift of mood and undertones from the last film. Yates shrouds this film in chaos with more of a documentary “shaky cam,” style to convincingly sell the fact that the protagonist’s lives have turned upside down.

The silver lining to the film’s obsession with the trio’s relationship is that it gave the actors a chance to somewhat expand on their characters. Performances from Daniel Radcliffe and Rupert Grint as Harry and Ron respectively, were just as solid as their past performances. Radcliffe though was able to show a little more gusto than he’s used to with his character as Harry exhibits small flashes of why he’s the “chosen one,” still waiting for his “Neo” moment. However, it was the character of Hermione played once again by Emma Watson that really captured center stage in this chapter. Hermione is the most intellectual of the close-knit chums and takes on the responsibility of keeping them safe in their fugitive status. Watson was able to deeply tap into Hermione’s angst of balancing her love for her best friend (Harry) and her boyfriend (Ron) while simultaneously trying to remain strong and focused on the task at hand.

Since Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 was based on only a portion of a complete book, it certainly plays out as such, and to no extreme fault of its own will most likely be the least replayed chapter of the series. However, there were some golden opportunities overlooked by the writers and director that could have eased rabid fan’s appetites as they wait a long 8 months for steak and potatoes after dinning only on Saltines.

Story: 7.0
Acting: 8.0
Writing: 7.5
Captivation: 7.5
Replay Value: 6.0

Total = 7.2

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Big Fish Recap 11/4/2010: We Did It!

Strike First, Strike Hard, and No Mercy. The Cobra Kai softball team has gone through many things together and has been honing their skills over the years preparing and preparing under the tutelage of the Swami for greatness. The team has championships under their belt, many great wins, but that one GREAT win has always eluded the team. It is almost the Amy we have been chasing since inception, something that would define greatness for us.

Enter the Sharks. In 2002 the Sharks won their first ever Red Bug Lake Championship and proceeded to dominate the league relentlessly for nearly the next decade. The Sharks beat up on a young and up and coming Cobra Kai team many times over the years without mercy. They even made it personal by signing our 2008 1st round draft pick and rookie phenom AC after only 2 promising seasons with the Kai.

Well, sometimes when you want something so bad it becomes your every obsession. Our team never admitted it but a win over the sharks was the one pelt we wanted to add to our trophy case more than anything. “I’ve always said Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it." Capt tucci told the team before the showdown.

Enter The new and improved Cobra Kai in an epic showdown of good vs evil October 29, 2010 as a day that will live in Red Bug Lake infamy. The game started off in usual Kai fashion we struck first behind a leadoff single and consecutive hits by the team to set the table for the Swami to give the team a 3-1 lead after one inning and just enough confidence to let everyone know……we can do this!

The Teams battled back and forth for 4 innings trading barbs and the Cobra Kai defense was playing the usual bend but don’t break attack. Johnny Blaze came to play on this day and certainly set the pace defensively in the infield. He broke out his Miyagi Glove and swatted down everything the Sharks shot his way killing every Shark Attack ripping out the teeth of the line-up by taking away their shots down the 3rd base line. “Experience tells you what to do; confidence allows you to do it." Blaze said after the game.

The Sharks kept coming but the Kai kept winning every inning and that was the game plan….stay within striking distance. “ I told these guys, keep us in the game until the seventh and that’s when we strike, I guaranteed the guys if we are in it in the bottom of the 7th WE WILL WIN!” Oil Can Spragus told the press after the game. Spragus made his usual veteran stop at 2nd killing another Shark rally snagging a hot screaming line drive up the middle as his veteran presence helped propel the team’s confidence.

With the Sharks rallying a crucial play at the plate allowed Sully to make his presence known by putting his club foot in front of home plate to tag out at home plate and kill the Sharks rally in the 5th. “ My foot is a few inches bigger from the Club Foot infection and it is a bit numb, so I just wanted to catch the ball and make sure they didn’t score so I could tell my new girlfriend all about it” Sully said after the game.


DonJuan continued his league leading OBP% raising it to .992 and Super Koko was right next to him in the line-up providing his SuperPowers at the bottom to propel the team. When an opposing Sharks General tried to put down the Kai at 1st SuperKoko stepped in and said “Excuse me, General, would you care to step outside?” and at that moment you could see the trepidation in the Sharks eyes and they knew they were no match for the New Cobra Kai.


Well, the team kept chipping away. We had our moment in the 7th when the Sharks made their move.

Enter the bottom of the 7th the Kai down 4 with everything on the line. A crucial coaching move by the Capt Tucci’s new and improved line-up allowed the kai to start the 7th with the top of the line-up leading the way. A single, a Spragues double ensued, a Swami deep fly ball for a quick run chipped away at the lead. And then it happened. The Sharks decided to walk Trox and his mighty bat to get to Roundhouse Reger. A proper coaching report would have let the Sharks now RoundHouse owns THE Hottest Bat in the Kai clubhouse currently as he was sporting 13 hits in his last 13 appearances including 3 crucial big hits in the game so far. “I Changed my approach and with a few more power bats in the line-up I put forth my concentration on giving the team the best chance to win by smashing line-drives instead of HR’s” Reger said after the game. Well, his new approach has sparked the Team tremendously. Then it happened………………Roundhouse took a 3-2 pitch and drove it to Deep Center over the CF’s head with Cliff and Capt. Tucci sprinting for his life representing everything we have worked toward since the beginning. “You become a champion by fighting one more round. When things are tough, you fight one more round.” Capt Tucci said as he was greeted at home plate by the whole team in celebration of our first victory over the Mighty Sharks.

The Kai left that night winners………but our Journey is Not Finished.

To Be Continued Under the Friday Night Lights

Big Fish Recap 9/22/10 - It's a Bird . . . It's a Plane . . .

The defending Champion Cobra Kai needed only one inning Friday night to reestablish their dominance in Red Bug Lake. The Kai struggled in their road opener after a few weeks off and looked a little rusty. However, Capt. Tucci was not about to allow the team to fall to 0-2 for the first time in six seasons.

Well, the Kai came out swinging and batted all the way through the order and posted a whopping 11 runs in the first inning….that’s right 11 frickin runs in one inning. The whole team batted the ball around and it seemed to deflate the life in the H& Tattoos as the Swami tattooed “We Own Your Ass” on the Center fielder just for good measure.

Oil Can Sprague’s was ready to re-assert his dominance and H&H felt his wrath right from the get go as he was on his game stifling poor H&H hitters all night allowing 1 hit and 0 Earned runs in 3 1/3 innings before exiting to a standing ovation from the Red Bug Lake Crowd.

Oil Can then inserted himself into the Outfield to protect his shut out for the team and performed as rover and made a leaping catch to save the Shut out for the Troxinater in the bottom of the fifth. “I surely didn’t know the old man even had any legs left on him…..but when he leaped into the air I thought it was Superman flying through the red bug lake night” The Swami said after the game.

Trox and his brother in arms The Cliff Hanger both laid a beat down on the H&H pitching staff jacking two out and hitting the rest to the fences until the will of our opponents was nearly gone. The breaking of their back and the tipping point for the game came in the bottom of the 4th when Koko donned his “Giambi Pink G-Strings” and unleashed a game breaking GRAND FRICKIN Salami deep down the Left Field line to put a nail in the coffin for H&H. Koko Is surely turning into his true alter ego of Superman, he will be missed this week as he takes a trip back to planet Krypton.

"Some people can read War and Peace and come away thinking it's a simple adventure story. Others can read the ingredients on a chewing gum wrapper and unlock the secrets of the universe. Well, I can’t do either but I did just hit my first Grand Slam” Koko said after the game.

“It wasn’t the best route I have ever seen, but I will take it” Johnnyblaze said after the game. Blaze was displaying his Miyagi Glove at the Hot corner snatching everything hit his way on this night much to the chagrin of the Tattoo artist hoping to get something going. DonJuan increased his all time league leading OBP % to .991 in honor of his wife’s birthday wishes.

“I just wanted to a get a quick win tonight as our thoughts were with one of our fallen teammates “Sully” whom was in the hospital battling a leg infection he suffered while rescuing a dog from a burning building” Capt. Tucci said after the game. The Game ball was awarded to Sully for his heroic efforts.

The Kai Take on their rivals the Sharks this Week in a defining game in this evolving rivalry. The Kai are primed and ready for battle with their new Weapons while the Sharks are smarting from a tough loss to Swim N Fun.

See You Under the Friday Night Lights for the Showdown.

Big Fish Recap 8/19/10 - Champions!

The 5th seeded Cobra Kai headed into Friday Night’s Championship game with one thing and one thing only on their minds………to win another Damn Championship!

The Kai’s gritty gutty and savvy veteran Oil Can Spragues took the mound for the Kai and was undefeated in postseason play and looked to keep that record alive in the Championship. “I simply told my guys, Hey….Failure is Not an Option tonight Boys” Sprague said after the game.

The Kai advanced to their fifth championship game and were looking to add another banner to the All Valley rafters after a stunning sweep in the playoffs last week . Spragues had a solid outing for the Kai on the mound fanning 2 and only allowing 3 runs over 7 innings to complete his impressive post season performance.

Capt. Tucci and his roving team of bandits in the outfield were the story on this night for the Cobra Kai. Tucci was up to usual antics out there running down every shot the G-Force sent his way and the Swami was right there to pick up any shot to Left as the outfield shut down the G-Force all night. “ We knew they were a power hitting team and we had to bring our A-game tonight if we wanted to have a shot at our 3rd championship and no way we were going to let Oil Can down” Tucci said after the game. The Swami had something different to say……”I have learned that in sports, you aren’t considered a Real Champion until you have repeated as a champ….for this team to now have 3 championships and in the manner we did it makes me proud to don the Black and Gold every Friday Night.”

The Kai were missing “Wild Man” Wilson for the championship game but it was no need to panic for Capt. Tucci as he artfully sacrificed Roundhouse Reger and his Cannon arm from his OF squad and borrowed him to the Infield for the game to protect the Hot Corner.

“My Mentor Mr. Vincent Lombardi once told me: The achievements of an organization are the results of the combined effort of each individual. Also, I have finished twice a few times in my life and I hated it…thus I was willing to do whatever it took to help us win the Whole Damn Thing” Reger said after the game. Well, Regs had several crucial plays at the hot corner on this night eating up every hit his way and gunning down the poor G-Force victims of his cannon. Regs also chipped offensively with 2 timely hits to help propel the Kai to victory.

The Kai jumped out to an early lead thanks in part to the Swami swatting a shot to right Field to open up the game in the second and the Kai’s newest assassin “China” belting another shot over the wall to give the Kai a 6-1 lead in the 4th inning.
The DonJuan continued his post season OBP% keeping it at the league leading .965 mark and getting on base at crucial moments on the night. Koko kept up his assassin style hitting attacking the left field line keeping G-Force fielders baffled enough all night to open up the field for the rest of the team. Everyone contributed at crucial times in the Kai’s 7-3 victory which found them claiming their 3rd League Championship.

“Strength and winning does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will…and that is what this team has” JohnnyBlaze said after the game.
Well, the Kai celebrated in style at Gators downing 46 pitchers and Sully even donated his time to a girls youth group there helping them learn how to sing on stage and helping their mothers manage the night.

All in all it was another great night in the history of the storied Cobra Kai Franchise!!!

The Kai were given the week off by Capt. Tucci for their accomplishments but look to defend their title in two weeks as the Fall League gets under way. The Kai are considered 3-1 favorites to repeat.

See You Soon Under the Friday Night Lights!

10 Greatest Apocalyptic Movies Ever

The 10 Greatest Apocalyptic Movies of All Time

10. Independence Day (1996)

One of the most hyped movies in cinema history, ID4 was a huge hit at the box office as it rode the coattails of its very well made trailers. Giving an ominous view of a world invasion by hostile extra terrestrials and the complete obliteration of the Empire State Building and The White House, Independence Day fooled many moviegoers into seeing one of the greatest popcorn flicks ever made. The aliens were unoriginal, the plot was something out of a bad comic book, and the writing was dripping with melted mozzarella.

After the initial outrage wore off, this film has now been accepted for what it was originally meant to be . . . fun. This is one of the last movies to use incredibly detailed models for special effects before CGI took over the industry. It also spawned an entire entourage of popcorn apocalypse flicks like Armageddon, Mars Attacks, 2012, etc. And sometimes forgotten this film not only launches the career of Will Smith, but it also has some other great tongue-in-cheek performances by Jeff Goldblum, Judd Hirsch, and who can forget one of the greatest pump-you-up speeches of all time by Bill Pullman.
“WE WILL NOT GO QUIETLY INTO THE NIGHT! WE WILL NOT VANISH WITHOUT A FIGHT!” If you don’t get goose bumps during that scene, you are dead inside.


9. 28 Days Later (2002)

This movie is much more than 99% of people’s introduction to Cillian Murphy. It is quite possibly the greatest zombie movie ever made. And there have been more than a few in Hollywood’s history, especially in its golden age. 28 Days Later is a chilling documentary style look into a world where an incurable virus has run rampant across England and possibly the world. Those infected have been reduced to animalistic, rage-endued cannibals. It was a truly scary movie that came along just when people were beginning to think scary movies were dead. Oh the irony.



8. War Games (1983)

Before he was breaking the 4th wall in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, he was breaking into NORAD as David Lightman. War Games was one of the first movies that showed the dark side of technology in a much too realistic Cold War setting. Warning us how we could go from Defcon 5 to Defcon 1 in a matter of days all because of a glorified and deadly game of tic-tac-toe.

No Joshua, I would not like to play a game.

7. The Terminator (1984)

If Joshua was the opening act, then Skynet is the main event. Just one year later, audiences got another and even scarier look into the dangers of artificial intelligence. Making the name Schwarzenegger a staple in American households is a grand enough feet, but The Terminator became so much more than Ahhhnold’s signature character. It embodied the prototypical evil robot. After The Terminator, any mention of robots, good or bad, you couldn’t help but think of the T800 endoskeleton with that ominous music in the background. And the effects have far from worn off. Even today, any scientific news story or corporation gloating about the slightest advance in AI, and that music immediately starts to fade into your brain as a shiny metal skull emerges out of a fiery apocalyptic future.

Or maybe that’s just me.

6. WALL-E (2008)

An incredible animated film, quite possibly the best ever. It deserved every bit of the Academy Award nomination for Best Picture. This computer generated masterpiece strikes right into the soul of what could be a greater threat to humanity than aliens or machines combined . . . us.

Even though it’s animated, Pixar is able to illustrate an Earth that looks just as bleak as any post apocalyptic movie before it. A complete wasteland filled to the brim with our garbage, no signs of plant or human life. All that remains is a lone waste-collecting robot trying to complete an impossible task for the past 700 years. Meanwhile the last colony of humans float aimlessly through space on a resort ship, atrophying their bodies and brains.

Unlike other dystopian films, a robot is the only one who can awake our humanity.



5. The Book of Eli (2010)

Once again we’ve gone and blown ourselves up. However this film addresses something other doomsday movies tend to leave waning. How do you completely reboot society? And what would be the most important component in doing so? In a world where we’ve been nuked back to the bartering system, the most powerful weapon is the written word. Especially the words in the book Denzel Washington’s Eli must protect with his life.

This film shows how the human condition comes around full circle, unfortunately. Another great villain played by Gary Oldman, and Denzel in full badass mode, this film gives a glimpse of what may have been the beginning of society by showing you its future.



4. Planet of the Apes (1968)

When talking about apocalyptic films, sci-fi films or just films in general, no other word can accurately label the original 1968 Planet of the Apes besides, “classic.” Charlton Heston’s most signature role of Colonel George Taylor is only rivaled by his portrayal of Moses in The Ten Commandments. Spinning off 4 sequels and 2 remakes, this is one of the most important science fiction films of all time. The most chilling warning of human extinction at our own hands comes in the form of a twist ending that would reign supreme for the next 27 years, right up to 1995’s The Usual Suspects.




3. Watchmen (2009)

One of the greatest comic book movies ever made. Watchmen takes you through a skewed version of 1985 where Richard Nixon is still president, super heroes have been outlawed and the Cold War is stronger than ever as the doomsday clock sits at 5 minutes to midnight.

This film may have characters running around in super hero costumes, but its underlying story was all too real at one point. The Cold War was one of the scariest times in this country and the planets history. So unpredictable the outcome of who would flinch first, Watchmen creates the first anti-villain to “solve” the problem.




2. Terminator 2 (1991)

The standard by which all action movies would be compared, Terminator 2 still reigns as the genre’s gold standard. The “next level” special effects still hold up to today’s best CGI, and the toughest chick in the world title belongs solely to Linda Hamilton’s Sarah Conner. Arnold’s “Mona Lisa,” took the Terminator franchise from cult classic to a worldwide blockbuster and cash cow, spawning off books, video games, toys, comics, a television series and 2 more films. And who could forget . . . Hasta la Vista Baby!




1. The Matrix (1999)

Building on the premise of the Terminator movies, The Matrix shows just how intelligent and cold AI can grow. Forget about building robots to destroy us, the Matrix machines have a much better use for our carcasses. Enslaving the entire human race without us even aware of it is a pretty neat trick. Machines use our bodies as their primary energy source while they enslave our minds into a virtual reality called “The Matrix.”

Sending Keanu Reeves career into the stratosphere, far away from his Bill and Ted days, and coining the phrase “bullet time,” are just two of the many effects this film has had on pop culture and the movie industry as a whole. Sort of a “Star Wars 2.0,” The Matrix is the patriarch to current day special effects films, redefining the possibilities for astonishing movie audiences.


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Big Fish Recap 8/11/10 - A SWEEP!

Johnny Blaze once told me a story that I never forgot when we encountered a cocoon at a Cobra Kai training camp. He said:

"You see this little Cocoon? This month’s just about to emerge. It's in there
right now, struggling. It's digging its way through the thick hide of the
cocoon. Now, I could help it - take my glove, gently widen the opening, and
the moth would be free - but it would be too weak to survive. Struggle is
nature's way of strengthening it".

Well, to say the Kai have struggled this season would be an understatement. But we have battled injuries, travel obligations, and other obstacles in our path to a championship. However, after all that the Kai are a better team for it and entered Friday nights tournament clearly as the team to beat.

The Cobra Kai entered into Friday Nights playoffs with a deceiving 1-3 record but were without doubt still the team to beat in Red Bug Lakes Tournament. In our first matchup the Kai’s were pitted against the vaunted Silver Streak Pitcher and the Goonies. To say the Cobra Kai have the Silver Streak’s number is an understatement.

The Goonies have never beaten the Kai and we were going to make sure of this and leave no doubt who is the Red Bug Lake Champs by making quick work of the Goonies.

The Team was missing Roundhouse Reger but Capt. Tucci recruited two power hitting hitmen in his place as we welcomed “WorldWide” Will and Mr. Miyagi’s nephew China to the roster. Well, the Kai jumped out to a 7-0 lead in the first inning promptly batting through the order to start the game and setting the pace for the night. The Swami lead the way in the first half swatting a missile to Right Field to clear the bases and to get us on the board in the first.

“Oil Can” Spragues was looking for his first back to back victory of his career and would do everything in his power to make sure he didn’t let this one slip away. Oil Can had in impressive outing but the infield behind was equally impressive as Koko wore his Donny Baseball underoos on this night and nothing got past the infield and Capt. Koko’s squad. Johnny Blaze was patrolling the hot corner and Wild Man Wilson ate everything up at short as the Goonies were stifled offensively.

Well, Oil Can Sprague would not be denied of his first post season victory as he took matters into his own hands at the plate as well going 4-4 in the first game as the Kai took care of the Goonies handidly 19-5 en route to their first win of the tournament. After the game a disgruntled Silver Surfer complained in a post game interview when he said:

“It's unfair, it was like pitching to a healthy Lou Gehrig all night”.

Bring on the Beat Downs!
Then in the most highly anticipated rematch in Red Bug Lake history the Kai squared off against the Beat Downs whom were undefeated lead by former Kai Troxx and T-185 Rocket Arm.

The Beat Downs jumped on the board first tallying 3 runs and looking like they were in a groove. However, the Kai’s defense settled down after that and Capt. Tucci and his band of roving bandits in the outfield took over from there.

“In the first game we didn’t get many reps as the infield took care of business for us, The Cobra Kai are a team, so I told my guys let’s take over this game and not let another hit in” And that’s exactly what the vaunted Kai OF did from there on. The infield could only watch in amazement as the Swami ran down bullets off the Beat Downs bats and Capt. Tucci was up to usual antics with sliding catches with his new Italiano Mit.

At the plate the Kai’s came together once again as everyone contributed to this one. Spragues kept his hit streak alive, Swami kept abusing the Right Fielder and the New Guy “China” saved the fireworks for the bottom of the 4th when he belted a 2-3 fastball over the Left Field wall for the Cobra Kai’s first grand slam of the season. Koko was also on fire from the plate attacking with vengeance the Left field line blasting three shots down the line and even turning two of them into doubles with his blazing fast speed.

DonJuan continued to climb back atop the league leaders in OB percentage and Sully kept the emotional support high for the team in the dugout and with his gritty gutty hitting style never being denied an opportunity to get to first base.

After the Game DonJuan gave the team a pep talk and said:
“So to recap, throughout it all, there's been a lot of laughter, and a few tears. But in the end the clouds parted, and the good Lord himself decided it was meant to be. And that's how I finished the regular season batting .978.”

Overall, it was a great total team effort as the Cobra Kai destroyed the Beat downs en route to our Sweep Friday night preparing us for our championship Game this Friday.

The Kai take on G-Force in a rematch for the all the Marbles under the Friday Night Lights at 7:00 PM.

Big Fish Recap 6/17/2010 - Strike First, Strike Hard . . .

Strike First, Strike Hard, and No Mercy. That is the Cobra Kai Creed. This past Friday night the Kai came together as a team and accomplished this goal in our heated re-match with Performance Radiator. The only problem…..we didn’t follow through on the NO Mercy mantra.

The Kai were primed and ready for the showdown and jumped out of the gate scoring 3 runs in the 1st inning. Oil can Spragues got the team going by stealing second and making sure to take out the 2nd baseman sending a message this game was going to be different. Wild Man Wilson fresh off his surgically fused T-850 arm drove in a pair to get us on the board.

The defense held strong and the Kai continued their assault well into the third inning posting a 8-1 lead. The Swami broke back out his assassin swing and attacked the Right Center field with relentless precision. Capt. Tucci also drove in a pair after being re-united with his new Frenzy Bat. Johnny Blaze continued his torrid hitting after being awoken a few weeks back by our next opponents the -G Force……which will be forever remembered as Johnny’s G-Spot revival game.

The Kai were rolling and posted a 12-2 lead. The game was so much in hand that Sully started scouting the other field as his man-crush Matt Barnes was busy destroying another opponent after his great Eastern Conference Finals run…..wait if he had a great run in the Eastern Conference finals he wouldn’t be playing softball in June?

The Defense was running on all cylinders as Mad Dog was pitching another gem. Koko was back in Donny Baseball mode wearing his Mattingly underoos making great plays at 1st base and Oil Can Spragues made the play of the night snagging a hard screamer to second and ending any chance of a radiator rally. The Swami also gunned down a los aggressivos player that dared test his arm…..learning what the rest of Red Bug Lake already knows don’t ever try the Swam.

The DonJuan was battling the heavy pressure of a 22 inning consecutive RBI streak that given the long media exposure he had to deal with from his Consecutive hit streak began to take its toll. “I’d walk through hell in a gasoline suit for the Cobra Kai, but this streak is too damn much” DonJuan said after the game. DonJuan did pitch in with 4 RBI’s but ending his consecutive RBI at bat streak.

Then in the bottom of the 6th it happened. Los Radiators put on a hitting display we have not witnessed in a long time. “We let our guard down, and eased off the gas pedal for an inning and Performance Radiator made us pay” Capt. Tucci said after the game. "The team that wins two-thirds of its one run games usually wins the League” Johnny Blaze was quoted as saying.

Well, in the bottom of the sixth Performance radiator rallied back and once they got the lead the Umps in a very precarious move called the game due to time constraints. However, on the adjacent field to us the other 7:45 game featuring Matt Barnes continued to play for 2 more innings. “That’s a heartbreaker” Mad Dog said after the game.

Well, the Cobra Kai look to follow through on our No Mercy Mantra Friday night as we square off against Johnny Blazes rival the G-Force.

See You Under the Friday Night Lights!

Big Fish Recap 5/27/10 - That's Two In A Row . . .

Swangin D's Got Thrown off the Road..

The last time the Cobra Kai squared off against the Swangin D, the Kai erupted for their most epic victory in club history a 22-0 romp that had Koko summoning his Tower Powers to actually amp down our collective super powers.

Well, the Team knew things would be different this time around and we had to prepare for battle. Capt. Tucci knew the team had what it takes to complete the season sweep of the D’s but knew we had to play together to accomplish it. Papa Tucci once told me “The best Captain is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it”, So I told the Guys, let’s go out and win this damn game and go drink some Cobra Kais”!

Wild Man Wilson was back and his newly re-fused T-385 Arm would be tested early and often and the team’s success depended upon it’s complete fusion with his body. Well, the first play of the game was a scorching shot in the hole at SS and Wilson ran it down and blasted a throw to Koko at first where he used his plastic man legs to complete the stretch and gain the out. After that play, you could sense the Cobra Kai knew it was “Game On.”

With Oil Can Spragues back at after a week hiatus the line-up was at near full strength minus RoundHouse Reger’s power. Well, in the top of the1st the Cobra Kai struck first after the Minister got on and Spragues does what he does best….give everything for the sake of the team. Mad Dog wanted some insurance so he immediately called for the Miyagi swipe upon Spragu’es single that left the team with runners on 1st and 3rd. Spragues immediately took for second giving his body up so the Minister could slide safely into home to start the Kai’s scoring streak.

The Swami was up to usual game mastering tactics commanding the Outfield to a bend but not break defensive mindset and vowing to leave the field with nothing short of a victory. “Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women”. I know my teammates follow a lot of Women, So I know I have to lead them to victory every night” The Swami said after the game. The Swami seemed to be floating on a magic carpet gliding to with ease to deep shots that seemed to be trouble but, then out of nowhere the Swami was there to run them down and clot the bleeding.

Johnny Blaze continued his torrid hitting at the plate as he lead the Kai in batting after his inner beast was awoken last week. Blaze also displayed his Miyagi hands in several clutch plays at the hot corner to kill any Swanging D’s rallies. “They weren’t the best plays I’ve ever made, but they were decent enough” Blaze said after the game.

The DonJuan started a new streak, one that won’t be contested for quite some time as he found a way to generate an RBI with every at-bat on the night driving his RBI streak to 14 straight at-bats. On one particular at-bat it seemed his streak was in trouble when only Capt. Tucci was on the base path stuck at first. However, the DonJuan pelted a shot to right field and the Captain injected his beast gene of the gazelle, greyhound mix and sprinted from first all the way home to keep DonJuans streak alive and give the Cobra Kai a seemingly insurmountable lead at 9-3.
Koko continued his torrid play as well bashing two hits in his kid Icarus Shoes and matching pants. ““I'm not a prophet or a stone aged man, just a mortal with potential of a superman. I'm living on.” Koko said after the game.

Well, the Cobra Kai continued their win streak with a 12-5 victory setting them up for a showdown with the Undefeated league leaders Swim N Fun this Friday Night. However, the Cobra Kai have a secret weapon being flown in From Boston as we speak preparing for the showdown. To Learn more, be sure to be there under the Friday Night Lights as the Cobra Kai square off against the Swim N Fun at 6:30.

Big Fish Recap 5/21/2010 - Don't Mess with Blaze!

Strike First, Strike Hard, and No Mercy that is the Cobra Kai Mantra. Well, The Kai took the field after being on the receiving end the last couple of weeks and were ready for revenge. Having never faced Performance Radiator and missing key veteran leaders “Oil Can Spragues”, Roundhouse Reger, and Wild Man Wilson whom was still reeling from the effects of his genetically fused T-850 arm as it morphs into him, the Kai were unsure of the fate the night had in store for them.

The team would need a Hero to save the day and help jump start their path to a championship. “I told my troops to be ready, because we have to pick up the slack left by our missing teammates” Capt Tucci said. The Swami had the Outfield in position and vowed not to allow any meltdowns out there. “I told Captain, Let’s go Son, give me the troops and I will lead them to the promised land”. The Kai had to call up one of their affiliate members Mike B. to help complete the Swami’s posse in the outfield while the Minister transitioned into the Infield. Mike B. Had several clutch plays in the OF under the watchful tutelage of the Swami and provided much needed speed on the bases.

Mr. Miyagi taught the Kai to always be fleet of foot and be ready for the challenges set before you, no matter how big or small. Well, fate was the first challenge as the bus from Tacoma was running behind and the Minister was late to the game signing the final contract status for Mike B. and his transfer papers. Never Fear, as Capt. Tucci made some quick changes and stepped into the lead-off spot ready to lead his troops to the promised land. The First inning saw the Kai strike first, as we chipped away at their pitcher and paved the way for 3 runs lead by DonJuan’s 1st of 7 RBI’s on the nights.

The Swami was his usual assassin at the plate dominating pitch counts and finding his way on base all night and even clearing them with a shot to the fences that broke the spirit of Performance Radiator.

The Real story of the night came in the later innings as two usually quiet leaders for the Kai decided enough is enough and they took the reins to be the vocal and field leaders the Kai needed so desperately on this fateful night.

The Usually quiet yet sure handed 3rd Baseman Johnny Blaze started the Kai’s fiery resurgence in the top of the 5th when he used his Miyagi hands to catch a throw from Short and attempted to turn a Double play to end the inning and stop a Rally at home plate. However, his T-850 Cyberdine targeting system does not account for objects larger than 395 lbs and thus he was not able to circumvent the target while still accomplishing the mission. Johnny’s throw bounced off the target and made a 90 degree bounce right into Fig’s glove for his second tag out of the night at home plate. The Ump could not believe his eyes and called the player safe thus enraging our opponents after their vanquished player at third yelled at Johnny claiming he did this to send a message to them. The usual quiet and calm demeanor of Blaze was temporarily shelved as he channeled his inner Chai but was unable to contain his pride as you do not question the Kai’s methods. Cooler heads prevailed as the Swami ran into to explain to Blaze that Irony has a funny way of showing itself.

Well, Irony did not have to wait long as Johnny Blaze stepped to the plate the next inning and drilled a shot to deep Left field directly over the head of his previous attacker and Blaze quickly strode home with an in the park HR staring down the man who dared step up to Blaze’s dojo. “It wasn’t the best HR I ever hit, but it sure did feel good to jam it down their throats” Blaze said.

Our Opponents had one last fight in them in the bottom of the 6th trailing by 8 runs. They chipped away with a few runs and just as a rally was starting for them the Kai’s other hero of the night decided to surface and end the game once and for all. The man wearing his Superman Underoos and his new performance pants and shoes ended their rally and stunned the crowd with his amazing play at First base. After putting two men on, the Radiators drilled one down the first base line where Koko jumped up in air and made a diving stop, then hopped right back up and sprinted, then dove to first to put out the unsuspecting runner and end the game in awestruck fashion. “I haven’t gotten dirty in awhile, and I knew we would be shorthanded tonight, Thus I decided it was time to break out the Superman underoos as I knew we would need em” Koko said after the game. Red Bug lake had thought for sure he was wearing plastic man underoos after he made a few amazing stretch plays at first earlier in the game.

Another, Kai member stepped up to provide big help was Sully. He stepped in at second and made several key plays and drilled two clutch hits in the 3rd and 5th inning to break the will of our opponents and let them know anyone of us can beat you at any time.

“That is the beauty of the Cobra Kai, on any given night anyone of our players can be the hero or the “Dave Roberts’’ The guy that sparks the team to victory.
Well, The Kai look to continue their winning Strike tonight as they square off against the newly rebuilt Swanging D’s in the rubber match after the Kai destroyed them last meeting.

See You Under the Friday Night Lights!

Big Fish Recap 5/13/10 - We Must Concentrate . . .

The Cobra Kai squared off against an unknown foe one of which we had never seen before last Friday Night. Performance Radiator was a new gang to enter the ring at Red Bug Lake park, but the Kai were ready for the challenge!

The Kai jumped out to an early lead as we posted 3 runs to start the night. The Kai’s first 3 batters all got on and scored on the Big E “AKA” the Swami’s crushing hit to deep Left Center to bring the boys home. Mad Dog came out throwing flamers at the Los Raiders and the defense held strong taking them out in the bottom of the first 1-2-3.

Capt. Tucci took control of his bat and was giving No Mercy to the Los Raiders all night. The Captain was in the zone. “ I just wanted my troops to know that” It's not whether you get knocked down; it's whether you get back up” We got knocked down last game so it was important to set the pace early that we were back Up.
The Defense was very solid in the first few innings as the Swami controlled the Outfield and Wild Man Wilson and his crew contained things in the Infield. I told my Outfielders and the rest of the Kai to don’t let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. If we follow these basic premises we will be successful.


Well, then the tides turned a bit as the Los Raiders kept chipping away and the Kai were getting a bit too aggressive on the base paths and in the field. Mr. Miyagi’s teachings of patience slipped away from the Kai. The Team kept hitting very solid a but the Los Raiders summoned their own superpower of ‘Omnipresence” away from DonJuan and they seemed to be everywhere on the field making plays that looked like surefire hits and turning rally innings into inning ending double plays.
We played a great game, It wasn’t the Best game we ever played but it was very good. They just happened to make the plays when it mattered most” Johnny Blaze said after the game.

Sully, Reappeared in the late innings and had some words of wisdom for the team to remember. My dad once told me that a wise leader once said “The real glory is being knocked to your knees and then coming back. That's real glory.”

Well, the Cobra Kai look to start their winning streak going this Week against the G-Force under the Friday Night Lights!

Iron Man 2

Two of the hottest commodities in Hollywood over the past few years have been comic book based films and actor Robert Downey Jr.. However with the highly anticipated sequel to 2008’s Iron Man, both Downey and the genre take a small step backward.

Iron Man 2 returns us to the world of Tony Stark and his alter, yet publicly known, ego Iron Man. This time around Tony not only continues to battle copy cat villains trying to use his own technology against him, but he must also find a way to stop the life-saving tech inside him from poisoning his body at the same time.

Jon Favreau returns to direct the second installation of the Iron Man saga and does manage to replicate the same mixture of comic book action, ultra realism and authentic characters the audience can get behind. What Favreau was not able to replicate with this film was a coherent story. In 2008’s Iron Man it was rumored, and actually confirmed by Jeff Bridges, that most of the script was written on the fly. The fact that it all came together as well as it did was a miracle in itself. Sadly this time there would be no miracle, and if Iron Man 2’s story and script was not written as the film was produced, it definitely gave off that appearance. This film moves along like a Ferrari in a supermarket parking lot with extra speed bumps. The scenes are rushed and the editing is choppy, almost as if the movie was a big-budget junior high project, thrown together the night before it was due.

The film is not without its merit though. Robert Downey is just as good in his reprise as the eccentric Tony Stark as he was in the first film, however last time he had a superior script backing him up. Downey remains the truest embodiment of a comic book protagonist ever brought to life. And in a surprising step up from her performance in the original, Gwyneth Paltrow actually jumps into the character of Pepper Potts as deeply as some of her more acclaimed roles. In the first film it felt like Paltrow was just phoning it in, but in Iron Man 2 Paltrow really seems to believe in Potts, reaffirming her as an important staple in the overall canon of Iron Man. This also could have something to do with the fact that the character of Pepper Potts is the only one to actually have stronger material to work with in the sequel than in the original film.

The new additions of Mickey Rourke and Scarlett Johansson as Ivan Vanko and Natasha Romanoff, are more flash than they are substance. Neither actor gets to show any real chops and are used more like flavor enhancers than a great side dish. Ditto for Don Cheadle as he replaces Terrance Howard as Lt. Col. James Rhodes. Sam Rockwell did manage to animate the staleness with his portrayal of Stark rival Justin Hammer. Hammer is very much an extension of Rockwell's performance in 2000’s Charlie’s Angles as bad guy Eric Knox. This was a welcome addition as Rockwell does smarmy better than anyone alive and every time he and Downey shared a scene, a master’s class in charisma ensued. Unfortunately this happened far too seldom in the film.

Among the mess of a script, there is a shining star in the story . . . the technology. Science fiction has engulfed its audiences with so much outrageous tech throughout the years that fans have become very jaded, consequentially making it very difficult to have a real “wow” factor to new ideas. The fictional Stark Industries truly does feel futuristic, but even more importantly it feels realistic. This film displays some fantastic special effects for technology that is both awe inspiring and gives a sense of feasibility during the next decade.

Perhaps Iron Man 2 had too high a wall to climb, but falling a little short of its predecessor would have been forgivable had the story and script not been so far below the standard it help to stabilize in the genre. Some great dialogue does manage to get squeezed into the cut and paste scenes, and there’s nobody better in the business to deliver witty quips and banter than Downey. Also, Favreau included some fantastic comic book easter eggs, which is very important and appreciated by the genre’s hard-core fans. Unfortunately, dedication and respect for the source material was not enough to overshadow the obvious problems with the script and a very anticlimactic ending.

Story: 6.0

Acting: 7.5

Writing: 7.0

Captivation: 7.0

Replay Value: 7.5

Total = 7.0

Big Fish Recap 5/6/10 - Wax On, Wax Off

As a boy growing up on the mean streets of Port Washington there were two constants in my life. Bob Ueker calling great Brewers games every memorable Spring and Summer day and my big Brother beating me up. Not a day went by that I didn’t get beat up or pushed around somehow someway, and there was basically nothing I could do about it. I tried every fashion to get him back, using illegal weapons (trophy’s, boots, butter dishes) anything I could get my hands on that would give me the advantage. In every sporting event it was usually my brother versus me and two or three of my friends……he would still usually beat us.

I hated every minute of it! However, one day unbenounced to me the tide turned. It happened when a friend and I were getting beaten up again for no reason. My buddy turned and looked at me and instead of running away we both went charging toward him and hearing Vince Lombard’s words in our heads we jumped into the air simultaneously and took him down with a double Crane Kick to the back and the knees. From that day forward things changed.

A similar story happened in Major league baseball. On October 17, 2003 Aaron ‘Bleeping” Boone crushed a devastating Home Run for the New York Yankees to lift them over the Red Sox once again in the ALCS and continue their dominance. Since 1918 up until that time the Yankees had won 27 World Championships and 40 AL Pennants compared to the Red Sox measly 0 World Championships and paltry 4 AL Pennants.

Why do I mention this? Because it is a foreshadowing of the Cobra Kai-Sharks feud. Once again the Kai took the field against the Mighty Defending Champion Sharks. And once again, the outcome was much the same. The Sharks and Kai battled back and forth and then the Sharks putting on a hitting display for the ages overcame the Kai. However, this game was different. The Kai didn’t back down at all, we kept battling and didn’t relent or give anything to the Sharks. The Sharks didn’t smell the blood in the water like they usually do against teams. Once they smell blood they go for the kill. However, this game they never achieved that ‘Kill” they simply took too many bites out of the Kai that we didn’t have enough of a base to complete our Crane Kick for the knockout.

The Sharks tried their usual power shots to the Gaps but the Swami was wise to this and adjusted the outfield to render their power hits useless. Roundhouse Reger ran down their blasts to Right Field and even gunned down an unsuspecting Shark at home plate trying to take too much heading home with no respect for the Kai. Reger also came through at the plate for the team punishing the Sharks for their lack of respect by putting one to the fence to spark the Team. However, it proved to be too little too late.

The Sharks are one of the most dominant teams in Red Bug Lake history. However, it should be noted they are also the “OLDEST” Team in our league. This game was different. It is only a matter of time before the tables turn and the Cobra Kai overtake the Sharks for league dominance. The Sharks know it and we know it. However, until that time we should be thankful for their “lessons” much like the same way Mr. Miyagi taught Daniel Son. At first, these lessons seem trite and a waste of time. But, I guarantee you one thing. In a few seasons, we will look back and say “Remember when these old guys use to beat up on us, yeah I can’t believe it…………let’s not let up and let’s go for the Mercy Rule on them just for old time Sakes”!!!!!

Until that time, just remember……Wax on….Wax Off……Wax On…..Wax Off!

See You under the Friday Night Lights! Let's Win this One For Johnny Blaze and Sully whom celebrated Birthdays this Week!!!

Big Fish Recap 4/29/2010 - Going the Distance

The Cobra Kai squared off against their rival the Swim N Fun in an epic battle last Friday Night that came down to the wire. Coming off the biggest win of the young Cobra Kai’s career the team was without Sully after his huge game but as always the Cobra Kai were set to go to battle.

The Swami had his troops ready to go. I just told the guys” we can win this one, I know deep down we are better than them and It is impossible to win the race unless you venture to run, impossible to win the victory unless you dare to battle.”

The Kai took Elliot’s words to heart and sprinted onto the field looking for victory. The Team battled back and forth behind Mad Dog and some great defensive efforts on the Left Side of the Outfield. The Cobra Kai jumped out to an early lead led by some timely hitting by the Swami and the top of the lineup. Oil Can Sprague’s was back in action and introduced himself back to first base just in time to be knocked home. Our Newest addition Wild Man Wilson took it right up the middle right back at the Swim N Fun with reckless abandon and told them “You aint so Bad, You aint So Bad” and the Kai looked primed and ready for a big Win.

Donjuan Quintana kept his league leading On Base % intact for a third straight season after blasting 3 hits up the middle to set himself up for 2 easy scores. However, in the top of the 3rd a strange thing happened that seemed to be prophetic in the ways of the game. Wild Man Wilson blasted a shot up the middle but as he sprinted out of the box the bottom of his shoe melted away much like Kid Icarus when he flew too close to the sun. Koko, quickly turned to his watchtower to investigate the phenomenon.

“Apparently, when a new warrior is fitted with a T-850 arm their body needs a couple of weeks to fuse with it and become one. I was told by upper management that we were not ready to take over just yet, we must be patient and our victory against the Swim N Fun was to be saved for a big night, like the reunitiion of the lost members of the Cobra Kai returning to help us” I don’t know the exact date but my intuitions tell me it will be in a few weeks.” Koko said in a strange voice after the game, right before he shook his head and said…..”What, What did I just say, I blacked out for a moment”.

Captain Tucci and the Swami were kept busy all night in the outfield running down blasts down the left field line and then to the fences. The Swin N Fun were relentless in their assaults. Wild Man Wilson and Johnny Blaze were busy holding down the fort in the infield, but the Swim N Fun’s onslaught proved to be a bit too much for the Cobra Kai on that night.

“ I just wanted to go the distance with Creed and the Swim N Fun, we’ve never gone the distance and that what we did” Johnny Blaze said after the game
It doesn't matter if you try and try and try again, and fail. It does matter if you try and fail, and fail to try again." Captain Tucci Said.

Well, the Kai lost the battle but have not lost the war. We have a big matchup against the hated Sharks this Friday night. On another note, the Dojo has learned that the Mighty Sharks are actually named after a gang from the 1950’s musical the West Side Story. Yes, that West Side story that features the mighty Officer Krupke. West Side Story is a touching love story about the Sharks and the Jets.

Oooohhhhh…..are we really going to lose to a team named after a Musical??????? Let’s show them what the Cobra Kai are all about this week under the Friday night Lights!

Big Fish Recap 4/22/10 - TRAVESTY!

Strike First, Strike Hard, No Mercy. That is the Cobra Kai Mantra and in all my years of following sports I have never seen the Cobra Kai follow through on that ideal in such an amazing way as they did this past Friday night.

The phenomenon that I witnessed is one that I don’t expect to see ever, and I mean ever again unless Red Bug Lake implements a Title IV ruling allowing Women to compete in our league. In the first inning the Cobra Kai seemed to be infused with DonJuan’s super power of “omnipresence” as it seemed like every player was on base at all times except when the Swami himself utilized his cyberdine targeting system to unleash ungodly hell on the Swanging D’s and clear the bases at his disposal.

The Defending champs began the season with a new addition as Mike (Yet to be Named) Wilson returned to the champs after a devastating shoulder injury. However, with the departure of Trox, the Swami was able to recapture his T-850 arm he gifted to the Troxinater and bestow it onto Wilsons surgically repaired shoulder. Tests are inconclusive but from all signs it seems to be a success.

In the first inning the Cobra Kai successfully batted through the line-up two times….Yes You read that correctly….Twice jumping out to a 15-0 lead. The Defending Champs were absolutely unstoppable. The team was flummoxed at their newfound powers. Oil Can Spragues could not be in attendance but his Super Power “Psych Out” Gift could be heard from miles away as the team immediately heard him saying…..Beware of THE TRAVESTY” rule…..Beware of “TRAVESTY”…….and thus the Kai did not know how to react as they had already beaten the life out of their newest opponents the Swanging D in one short half inning.

In that inning the Big Fish hit an infield double. That is correct he hit the ball to the 2nd basemen and simply sprinted past both the first baseman and 2nd basemen on his way to 2nd base. Sully, came through in the biggest fashion with the greatest hit of the night blasting a shot over the Centerfielders head for an in the park grand slam.

“You never know who is going to step up for the team and be the hero and tonight that man was Sully” Capt. Tucci said after the game. “I have been preparing for this moment my whole life, and when the Captain called my number I was ready to go” Sullly said after the game. After a devastating first inning the Swanging D’s were brutally beaten and grasping for life with every breath. Koko, had attacked their Leftfielder so bad he was left wandering around the outfield in a daze with no shoes or socks completely disoriented after the effects of Swami’s Targeting System, Koko’s relentless punishment, and Roundhouse Regers “Moonshine Muscle” power left the outfield dazed and confused.

The Cobra Kai lives by the credo of No Mercy but the team was in serious jeopardy of not being able to follow through on this mantra. Immediately, Koko utilized his superpower of Watchtower prognostication and found a system that is able to suppress the team’s super powers for a limited time. “I was hesitant to install this untested system, but I felt I had to as if I didn’t the other team could have gotten seriously injured or killed, I was left with no choice but to go forward with it” Koko said after the game. Although, he only deactivated a few players superpowers it still was not enough as the Umps sensed the serious problem and finally called the game at 22-0 and put the Swanging D’s out of their misery in the 2nd inning.

The Cobra Kai looked to continue the defense of their championship this Friday as they face their heated rivals the Swim N Fun in a chance at redemption from last season.

See You Under the Friday Night Lights!

Kick-Ass

Splice together the fundamental story telling of Spider-Man with the ultra-realism of Watchmen, and then finish it off with some heightened violence, Kill Bill style.
The result . . . a very Kick-Ass film!

Hollywood continues to ride the comic book money train, but a fantastic side effect in their quest for cash is that producers are diving more and more into lesser-known stories and graphic novels. Kick-Ass is such a story, based on the graphic novel written by alternate reality god, Mark Millar. Protagonist Dave Lizewski, aka Kick-Ass, narrates his tale about what would happen in the real world if a random citizen with no real purpose to avenge or hero code to uphold, just decided to suit up and start fighting crime. Baffled by the ratio of superhero fans to actual superheroes, Lizewski decided to be a pioneer and create a crime-fighting alter ego. However to his surprise, Kick-Ass finds that he’s not the only costume-clad hero patrolling the streets after all.

This film excels in its ability to explore new alleys of a genre in which it is very difficult to produce completely original ideas. Kick-Ass is able to deliver the inconvenient and brutal truth to why vigilantism is not a booming business. Slapping on some tights does not magically enhance someone’s fighting abilities or protect them from blades and bullets. However, it does strike a nerve in the collective soul. And in the age of the viral video it’s easier than ever to reach millions of people in just a few minutes, something that this film portrays very realistically.

With the exception of Nicolas Cage, who plays Big Daddy, the cast is primarily made of virtual unknowns. Of course many will recognize McLovin, (Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Superbad) as the Chris D’Amico/Red Mist character, but for the most part the cast is very fresh. Aaron Johnson (Dave Lizewski/Kick-Ass) does a fantastic job embodying the every-day kid with a superhero complex. Johnson is able to truly connect with the audience and give a sense of his frustration with society but at the same time exude just how petrified he is to do something about it. As the hero Kick-Ass, Johnson also triumphs by construing the confidence a simple change of clothes can instill despite struggling with the fear of his own mortality.

Cage and Mintz-Plasse bring the goods to their perspective characters as expected, but the indisputable diamond in the ruff in this film is Chloe Moretz who plays Mindy Macready/Hit Girl. The character of Hit Girl has the ability to induce the audience to laugh, cringe and shout “Damn!” simultaneously throughout the film. Any reservations about the validity of an 11-year-old girl fighting grown adults are washed away with Hit Girl’s first appearance on screen. She gains instant credibility as the smallest badass on Earth.

Kick-Ass is able to stay true to the raw brutality of its characters, which in part made them so popular in the graphic novel. But amazingly the hard-core violence does not shadow the characters’ personalities. It’s easy to feel a real connection with them and although murder is everywhere, it’s secondary to the underlying message of the film.

Although Kick-Ass starts out with a brutal reflection of the real world, it does gradually work its way to the surreal of comic cells. However it is not a jarring leap, the action escalates gradually and significantly bends but does not break the rules of reality. Kick-Ass definitely lives up to its title, leaving viewers with sensory overload and an inkling to jump online to purchase brightly colored costumes and firearms.

Story: 8.5
Acting: 8.5
Writing: 8.5
Captivation: 9.5
Replay Value: 9.0

Total = 8.8

Big Fish Recap 4/7/2010 - THE CHAMPS!

We all know Strike First, Strike Hard, No Mercy is the Cobra Kai Creed. The team followed through on 2 out of 3 in the our quest for our 2nd Championship Friday night but would it be enough? Perfect might be the enemy of the good, but good enough proved perfection's greatest ally in the Cobra Kai’s quest at an undefeated Season in Conference and a Championship trophy to add to our banners hanging at Gators.

The Kai were pitted against our wannabe rivals the Goonies and we jumped out to an early 9-0 lead despite playing a man down as Oil Can Spragues was delayed in a speaking visit to Daytona Beach. Double S was also missing as he had a prior commitment to our double A franchise.

However, the Cobra Kai would not let anything stand in between the team and a date with destiny to raise the trophy one more time.

“ Vince Lombardi once told me The Strength of the group is the strength of its leader and the harder you work the harder it is to surrender. And I just told myself there was no way I was going to let the Cobra Kai walk away from the field Friday night without that trophy in hand” The Swami told reporters after the game. The Swami came ready to play and the “Big E” started things off early for the Kai as he had a bases clearing triple to start the game and set the pace for the Kai early on. Everybody contributed offensively once the pace was set and the team batted through the line-up to start the game off.

Capt. Tucci was breaking in his new bat and banged home two runners including the DonJuan whom secured his second straight On Base Percentage title by safely reaching base all four at bats Friday night and ending the season with an .997 OBP%. “Los Pendehos will never hold me down, and I have nobody to thank but my teammates for this, and it is all worth it to raise the trophy” DonJuan said through his interpreter wife Jen after the game.

SuperKoko wore his destroyer Underroos Friday night relentlessly attacking the Left Field line until injuring yet another Left Fielder and putting him down for the count. The Goonies were so baffled by our relentless assault on the bases they had to change fielders three times to try and shore up holes the Kai exploited.

However, the Team forget to deliver on our motto of “No Mercy” as after posting an early 10-2 lead the team began planning the celebration at Gators and let the Goonies creep back into striking distance for a brief period led by the stellar play of their hot fielding pitcher the pony tailed Silver Streak.

“At first I was worried about the game being called for Travesty, but then the team started testing their pitcher and going right at him, I knew he was a crafty veteran and told the team to hit away from him” the teams veteran spokesman Oil Can Spragues said after the game. Once the Kai realized this they settled down and were able to put the game away.

Johnny Blaze was in full control of the Infield snagging several line drives hit his way at third and his partner to the left SS Trox did much of the same. Trox also belted two line drives deep to keep the game in check for the Kai late in the matchup. Roundhouse Reger added three timely sacrifice fly’s late in the game to help seal the deal for the Cobra Kai.

The Team closed it out in the fifth and claimed our second Championship in team history. "Every player should be accorded the privilege of at least one season with the Cobra Kai. That's softball as it should be played - in God's own sunshine. And that's really living, but unfortunately for the rest of the league this is a family and we aint going nowhere so let the rest of Red Bug know this is Cobra Kai Country….Let’s do a Shot” Capt Tucci said after the game.

Well, The Kai won and completed their goal of winning another championship. The Team celebrated in style putting back a new record of 86 pitchers in celebration at Gators. Till, Next season the Cobra Kai reign supreme.

Kluge Chronicles - 4/1/10

How’s it going Playaz? PJ with a new chronicle for ya ass! I’m going different with it this time because I don’t think the last post caught everybody’s attention. So I’m going to try something new. First off I’ve noticed that in order to make a statement on this blog you have to know some politics, healthcare fuck religion bullshit. I have my opinions but I mostly keep them to myself. However I do enjoy having an intelligent “one on one” to get a more open mind. For instance I’d like to hear an opinion on Hugo Chavez. Ever since I met Meritza, my Venezuelan wife, I have been trying to keep up with all the news on him. It seems to me that he is “trying “to do good for his country but all he is doing is making more money for himself and giving himself more power. I’ve speak to a lot of middle and upper class Venezuelan citizens and they say he is taking away more and more of their business. It sounds like he is going towards communism. Hugo claims to be helping out the poor who outnumber the upper and middle classes therefore giving him more power.

Although I feel stronger opinions on a few topics, I would not kill for some issues like abortion, healthcare whatever. What I’m trying to say I like to keep things simple. Although I enjoy intellectual conversations, I am much better with entertainment type shit and looking forward towards a positive future.

I had an idea in the shower today about sharing some of my entertainment type knowledge with all of you. I’d like to make a few suggestions on new and old entertainment media I feel everyone should watch or read at least once in their life. Now I can assume most of you have either read or saw the suggestions below but maybe it’s been a while. And if you didn’t then that’s a bonus to you. Also I will make a few comments on the suggested pieces. Three last things. 1. I’m not steeling the “Koko Review”; I’m merely making a comment. 2. I’m not stealing a G.O.A.T. top ten. 3. Some may not have time but if you do enjoy.
Suggested Shit

New Movie: Brooklyn’s Finest – Great movie directed by Antoine Fuqua, the same guy who did Training Day. It probably won’t win any Oscars, well Richard Gere could be nominated, but that’s it. It’s gangsta!

Old Movie: Do the Right Thing – Great movie directed by Spike Lee. I’ve been riding out to Public Enemy’s greatest hits album and every time I here “Fight the Power” I think of the opening credits with a hot Rosie Perez dancing her heart out.

Book: The Catcher and the Rye – Written by J. D. Salinger who is from the New England area and just pasted away last year. Yes I know it is high school material but when was the last time you read it? Reacquaint yourselves.

Album: Oracular Spectacular – by MGMT. MGMT is from Brooklyn, NY and this album came out in ’07. I personally like the album and feel it sounds like they were inspired by Pink Floyd.

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Big Fish Recap 3/31/09 - Live to Fight Another Day

Strike First, Strike Hard, No Mercy. Well that is the Cobra Kai mantra but that is not what we did last Friday night in our biggest game of the season against the Swim N Fun. The stage was set for a big showdown for second place and a clear path to the championship game. The Kai were primed and ready…..but we did not follow through for some reason on the field. I think everyone was gearing up for Neil’s big blowout birthday and the obligatory pie in the face at gators.

Swim N Fun jumped out to an early lead and they never looked back. Not much to write about from the game as once the Swimmers jumped out to their lead it appeared the Kai could not match their intensity level. The Swim knew they were playing one of the most elite teams in the league and they were not about to let that opportunity slip by.

“I wanted this game so bad, I was going to give everything I had and then some” Said the Swami after the game. Well, the Swami did that as he provided some pop for the team offensively and even smacked an in the park home run to try and spark a Cobra Kai rally. Well, unfortunately the team did not respond.

Most of us know the legendary packers Coach Vince Lombardi's famous quote: "Winning isn't everything; it's the only thing".

While he always put that kind of emphasis on winning, most of us don't know that he also said: "If you can't accept losing, you can't win." While we all like to win much more than we like to lose, in order to play and be a part of something greater, we have to be willing to take the risk that we might lose. It has to be accepted that losing is a natural a part of participating and of winning.

Well, the beauty of the Cobra Kai spirit is that we get to live again to fight another day. And that day comes this Friday as we take on our mini-rivals the Goonies. The team will use this loss as a learning tool and grow from it and we will have our chance for revenge in the playoffs.

“There were things said after the game that were tried to use to motivate the team, but when it’s all said and done were a family and the family that plays softball together stays together” Thus, the team will move on from Friday’s nights loss and become stronger together” Said Capt. Tucci after the game.

Well, the team certainly kept their championship pace at Gators as the Kai downed a record breaking 47 pitchers in celebration of Capt. Tucci’ 30th Birthday. Oil Can Spragues even successfully used a 300 lb lineman to sneak up on the Old Man Tucci and to complete the Pie in the Face tradition. Good Times.

I will see You under the Friday Night Lights!